Story:Lauren Sarah (part 2)
Lauren Sarah (part 2)
Then arguments rose. Attitudes rose and you pushed and pushed and you hurt everyone. And you were hurting. You left. My 16 year old baby girl left to stay at her boyfriends parents house. Can you remember-you ignored me in the street and when I spoke you shouted and I was distraught. Why did you hate me so much. I text you when your exam results came out and you were hurtful asking why I wanted to know.
Eventually we were on speaking terms-but you didnt return for a few months and it hurt so so much. You did come back and at first things were great-but within a few weeks we were back to worse than before. You found a flat and moved in with your boyfriend. I felt such a failure. You were suddenly thrust into the grown up world you craved. You got a job and stepped up to your responsibilities.
Things got better and it seemed for the best-you would come and visit and make an effort and everyone was getting on so much better.
your boyfriend messed about and you rang me from Spain hurting and crying and for the millionth time my heart broke for you. And you went back to him and I smiled and supported you.
Eventually you did realsie and left him. Quite quickly you got with somebody else. I wished you would spend time with your friends and being your age and carefree. But you seemed to do this with him and seemed happy again-at last.
You know I only realised today that we are very alike. I always wondered what I did to deserve you as I was very boring, a "good" girl who the worst I did was get wrong for staying in my room and not being social. But today I realised-I know I have always been an unsocial sort of person-you are social-I have always not felt good enough-and I realise you are like that-I realise that I have pushed my parents away and only open up to a very chosen few. All this time-you have been repeating me (only with extreme behaviour lol).
I am so sorry if you have felt I have ever let you down